Sooner Politics.org
  • Front Page
  • SoonerPolitics TV
  • Oklahoma News
    • Oklahoma Reports
    • AP Wire
    • NewsBreak Oklahoma
    • Election Watch
    • Oklahoma Almanac
    • Trump Tweets
    • Muskogee Now
    • Capitol Beat
    • Faked Out Sports
    • OSU Sports
  • Legislative Watch
    • Legislative Scores
    • Congressional Tweets
    • Kevin Stitt
    • Lawmaker's Journal
  • Editorial
    • From the Editor
    • Weekend Report
    • 3D Politics
    • On This Date
  • Financial
  • Health/Science
    • Public Health News
    • Ron Durbin
    • Dr. Jim Meehan
    • OMMA Reports
    • Cannabis Health Recipes
    • Okla. Health Blog
    • My Cannabis Health Story
  • Sooner Issues
    • State Groups
  • Sooner Analysts
    • OCPA
    • Pat Campbell
    • Muskogee Politico
    • 1889 Institute
    • Constitutional Grounds
    • E PLURIBUS OTAP
    • Steve Byas
    • Everett Piper
    • Michael Bates
    • Steve Fair
    • Andrew Spiropoulos
    • AircraftSparky
    • Corruption Chronicle
    • Josh Lewis
    • Sooner Tea Party
    • Red River TV
    • Me, Myself, & Liberty
    • Nigel O'mally
    • Cut The Crap
    • KOKC
  • Nation
    • Breitbart News
    • Rush Limbaugh
    • Daily wire
    • Steven Crowder
    • InfoWars News
    • The F1rst
    • NewsMax
    • America's Voice
    • Ron Paul Institute
    • Bill Gertz
    • Jamie Dupree
    • D i s r n
    • Just the News
    • Trey Gowdy
    • Fox Politics
    • National Commentary >
      • Kanye West Campaign
      • The Media
  • Wit & Whimsy
    • Terrence Williams
    • Witty Cartoons
    • Will Rogers Said
    • Repository of Pith
    • Dubiosity
    • Steeple Chasers
    • The Partisan
    • Satire
    • New Media Guide
  • World
    • Almanac >
      • Political Events Calendar
  • SoonerPolitics.org
    • Masthead

House GOP Leader Todd Hiett; Irritated That Gov. Has 'Grown A Pair'

8/1/2020

0 Comments

 
OKLAHOMA CITY (OP) – According to sources within the House of Representatives, House Speaker Todd Hiett, R-Kellyville, is dismayed that Gov. Brad Henry has grown a pair of brass round ones. 

  “I’m not pleased with it,” said Hiett. 

  Upon the GOP takeover of the Oklahoma Legislature in the November elections, Republicans were expected to whip out their legislation in the face of astonished Democrats. At the time, Henry was expected to offer feeble counter proposals, including “EDGEpalooza 2005: Reaching for Excellence and Rubbing It all over our Bodies.” 
  However, the passage of lottery and cigarette tax measures has prompted a swelling in Henry’s package, and he has mobilized his mass of confidence to pre-empt Republican legislation. Last week, Henry was seen whipping out his massive prescription drug plan at a press conference.

“You think you can roll with the big boy? Bring it on!” 

said Henry.
  No sooner has Republicans debuted their tort reform plans then Henry slapped them upside the head with a “Tax Rebate, OCAST investment” package. School consolidation and workers comp reforms were blocked by a higher education bond issue and a sweet slice of worker’s safety measures. 
  Despite early opposition by Henry’s developing spine, Hiett says Republicans will chip away at the governor over the course of the session. “Clearly, the governor’s sizable package has presented an unexpected obstacle to our legislation” said Hiett. However, the Speaker said that he is no stranger to ball breaking. Hiett most recently broke the traditional Speaker’s Ball by banning alcohol from the event.
0 Comments

Senate Republicans Amend Bible To Remove Inconvenient Passages

7/29/2020

0 Comments

 

  Golden Rule, Beatitudes among sections deemed incompatible with GOP agenda 

By Lee Cruce, Partisan Staff Reporter
  One week into the 50th Legislative Session, House Republicans have forced through a bill that would amend the New Testament of the Holy Bible. Rep. John Trebilcock, R-Broken Arrow, said the changes were necessary to remove certain contradictions with orthodox GOP ideology. 
  "Clearly, it's embarrassing that so many aspects of our platform are opposed to key Christian principles. Saturated as we are in Social Darwinist special-interest money, we feel it would be easier and more efficient to simply amend the Bible" said Trebilcock. 
  Among the passages to be edited is Matthew 7:1, commonly referred to as "The Golden Rule." Traditionally, this verse admonishes readers to treat others as they would like to be treated. However, under the Republican package, the line would be modified to specifically exclude homosexuals.
"This is America. (Homosexuals) can do whatever they want in their own homes," said Sen. James Williamson, R-Tulsa, who will carry the bill in the Senate. "However, once they try to get me to treat them with the same dignity and respect that I would expect myself, then we have a problem."
Williamson says another troublesome section is Matthew 5:1-12, also known as "The Beatitudes." In these brief sayings, Jesus comforts people who would be omitted from Republican proposals, such as the poor, the sick and the meek. 
  Under the republican amendments, "Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after justice: for they shall have their fill" has been changed to, "Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after justice, up until $300,000, for thine Legislative Leaders have not agreed to any 'moratorium' on tort reform, and plan to make the issue a major component of our platform in the upcoming session." 
  Trebilcock said that, in future legislation, Republicans would move to Old Testament revision, seeking to expand the fate of Sodom and Gomorrah to cover liberal voters
0 Comments

Sonic Executives Say Marijuana Legalization Would Boost Food Sales

7/26/2020

0 Comments

 
OKLAHOMA CITY (OP) – An Oklahoma City-based restaurant chain is asking the state legislature to legalize marijuana, noting that habitual users of the drug find the company’s products “hella-tasty.” Sonic, which bills itself as “America’s Drive-In,” serves up hamburgers and hotdogs in hundreds of locations around the country. 
  Executives say the company’s products are especially popular among those with “the munchies,” a side effect of marijuana intoxication. In a presentation before the House Business and Economic Development Committee, Sonic executives said statewide legalization of the drug would boost sales throughout the industry, from McNuggets to Taco Mayo’s “bitchin’” potato locos.
  In a recent study, Sonic customers who did not use marijuana rated their food from “fair” to “excellent.” However, users with the munchies said the same products were “friggin’ awesome dude.” Habitual marijuana users, also known as “stoners,” are also less concerned with customer service. They also have little use for napkins, straws and correct change.

   According to Sonic estimates, stoners currently comprise only 10 percent of the company’s customers, yet account for 40 percent of sales. They also form 70 percent of the company’s workforce, primarily line cooks and night managers. Last year, Sonic was believed to donate millions in campaign contributions. An exact amount was unavailable, however, since much of the special interest money was covered in chili and cheese.
0 Comments

Tort Reform To Be Decided By Wizzing Contest

7/21/2020

0 Comments

 
OKLAHOMA CITY (OP) – In a rare display of bipartisan cooperation, House Majority Leader Larry Adair, D-Stilwell and House Minority Floor Leader Todd Hiett, R-Kellyville, announced that Oklahoma lawsuit reforms would be settled through a legislative pissing contest. Tort reform has been a hot-button issue since a Wall Street Journal editorial accused Oklahoma of offering “jackpot justice.”
 The debate has deeply divided the legislature, with Republicans claiming reform is necessary to promote economic development and Democrats saying the legislation would curb the rights of the injured. “Oklahoma wants lawsuit reform, but the Democrats are blocking the process to protect their trial lawyer cohorts,” Hiett said. “We’ve offered plan after plan, only to see our proposals gutted in conference committees.” “We just hope this will shut them up,” Adair said.
 The pissing contest is a legislative procedure outlined in Article 28, Section 10 of the state constitution, in between the part that defines the ignition point of kerosene and the provisions that cover how many hours a child can work underground. It states, in part, that, “in the case of a breakdown in the political process, issues may be decided by a urinary confrontation.”



 The next 40 pages of the state constitution govern the rules of the contest, including regulations for distance, duration, and “the crossing of streams.” The contest is scheduled to take place next week between Adair and Hiett. Oklahoma Supreme Court Chief Justice Hardy Summers will serve as the official judge. In preparation for the showdown, Adair and Hiett say they have raised their fluid intake from 12 to 24 beers per day
0 Comments

Attorney General Files Restraining Order Against Lawmakers Mustache

7/16/2020

0 Comments

 
OKLAHOMA CITY (OP) – On Monday, Oklahoma Attorney General Drew Edmondson announced that he had filed a restraining order against the mustache of Rep. Larry Rice, D-Pryor. “Rice’s facial hair is out of control,” said Edmondson. “We feel that, if it is allowing to grow unchecked, it threatens to consume the House.” 


  Edmond said the action was necessary to protect Rep. Joe Eddins, D-Vinita, who sits next to Rice in the House and has been assaulted by the mustache on various occasions. “I’m not saying he has to shave it but something has to be done. I can’t see anything from my desk anymore, and it’s like voting in a straw hut.” Edddins said. 


  In a previous filing, the attorney general successfully restrained the mustache of Rep. Greg Piatt, D-Ardmore. He said he is considering taking action against the goatee of Sen. Charles Ford, R-Tulsa, as well as filing suit against the soupstrainer of destruction worn by Rep. Mike Mass, D-Hartshorne
0 Comments
    Picture

    The Oklahoma Partisan

    In 2004 & 2005, an anonymous group of journalist/artists compiled a library of what then was contemporary humor surrounding Oklahoma state government. Sadly the venture only lasted a couple years. But the Oklahoma Partisan was a gem of political comedy.
    Today most of these characters of focus are no longer in the public arena. But the levity provided at their expense served to help the closely divided legislature to laugh at their colleagues. The truly humble among them even laughed when the joke was on them.

    Archives

    August 2020
    July 2020

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

​FRONT PAGE •  OKLAHOMA NEWS • EDITORIAL • SOONER ISSUES •​ STATE GROUPS •​ SOONER ANALYSTS •​ LAWMAKER'S JOURNAL •​ NATION •​ NATIONAL COMMENTARY •​ CARTOONS •​ ​
Picture

918 . 928 . 7776

 SoonerPolitics.org is committed to informing & mobilizing conservative Oklahomans for civic reform & restored liberty. We seeks to utilize the efforts of all cooperative facets of the Conservative movement... Content of the diverse columns are solely at the discretion of the dozens of websites who create the content.   David Van Risseghem  is the founder of this platform.
 Sooner Politics News is a platform, not a media site. All our bloggers get their feeds promoted regardless of content. As soon as We suppress or delete even one posting, we become an endorser of whatever We didn't censor..The publisher doesn't (and could not) logically agree with all the content, so we would not expect any rational reader to agree, either. What we do hope, is that readers will think for themselves, and at least be better informed of the issues, events, and values that our citizen journalists work hard to provide for free.. We automate much of the tasks so that our sources' content gets as much exposure as possible. We encourage constructive discussion & debate. The solution is more free speech, not less.​

  • Front Page
  • SoonerPolitics TV
  • Oklahoma News
    • Oklahoma Reports
    • AP Wire
    • NewsBreak Oklahoma
    • Election Watch
    • Oklahoma Almanac
    • Trump Tweets
    • Muskogee Now
    • Capitol Beat
    • Faked Out Sports
    • OSU Sports
  • Legislative Watch
    • Legislative Scores
    • Congressional Tweets
    • Kevin Stitt
    • Lawmaker's Journal
  • Editorial
    • From the Editor
    • Weekend Report
    • 3D Politics
    • On This Date
  • Financial
  • Health/Science
    • Public Health News
    • Ron Durbin
    • Dr. Jim Meehan
    • OMMA Reports
    • Cannabis Health Recipes
    • Okla. Health Blog
    • My Cannabis Health Story
  • Sooner Issues
    • State Groups
  • Sooner Analysts
    • OCPA
    • Pat Campbell
    • Muskogee Politico
    • 1889 Institute
    • Constitutional Grounds
    • E PLURIBUS OTAP
    • Steve Byas
    • Everett Piper
    • Michael Bates
    • Steve Fair
    • Andrew Spiropoulos
    • AircraftSparky
    • Corruption Chronicle
    • Josh Lewis
    • Sooner Tea Party
    • Red River TV
    • Me, Myself, & Liberty
    • Nigel O'mally
    • Cut The Crap
    • KOKC
  • Nation
    • Breitbart News
    • Rush Limbaugh
    • Daily wire
    • Steven Crowder
    • InfoWars News
    • The F1rst
    • NewsMax
    • America's Voice
    • Ron Paul Institute
    • Bill Gertz
    • Jamie Dupree
    • D i s r n
    • Just the News
    • Trey Gowdy
    • Fox Politics
    • National Commentary >
      • Kanye West Campaign
      • The Media
  • Wit & Whimsy
    • Terrence Williams
    • Witty Cartoons
    • Will Rogers Said
    • Repository of Pith
    • Dubiosity
    • Steeple Chasers
    • The Partisan
    • Satire
    • New Media Guide
  • World
    • Almanac >
      • Political Events Calendar
  • SoonerPolitics.org
    • Masthead