WASHINGTON D.C.—In a long-awaited move toward modernity, the United States Justice System is shutting down all brick-and-mortar courthouses and moving exclusively to Twitter. “This is where the country has been headed for years,” said Jack Dorsey, CEO of Twitter. “Twitter is where real justice happens, and it doesn’t take weeks, months, even years. It can get the job done in minutes.” His comments were met with enthusiastic applause.
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via The Babylon Bee