From the archives of Oklahoma’s great political satire writers of decades past, we bring you this classic reprint of a spoof that caused more than a little irritation to the political class on Lincoln Blvd.
By Johnston Murray - Partisan Staff Reporter
A bipartisan coalition of female lawmakers is backing a bill that would require men to engage in foreplay for at least 10 minutes prior to any act of sexual intercourse. Supporters say that HB 24601 would increase the state’s cuddling and snuggling index. Oklahoma currently ranks 47th in the nation for pre-coital interaction.
Rep. Sue Tibbs, R-Tulsa said;
“This bill would help lower Oklahoma’s teen pregnancy rate,” said Sen. Angela Monson, D-Oklahoma City. “Most Oklahoma men want to spend about five minutes getting their groove on.“ Monson said that, if men were required to actually talk to their lovers, many would probably opt for Internet porn instead. Female backing for the bill was bipartisan, with Democrats saying that the bill would help the children and Republicans arguing that it would boost economic development.
Rep. Bill Graves, R-Oklahoma City, said he will vote against the bill, as he opposes any legislation that would benefit women. Furthermore, Graves said, the legislation presumes the existence of a female orgasm. According to Graves, the female orgasm is
There is some male backing for the legislation, described by A number of male legislators oppose the bill, saying that it would hurt their families by increasing the amount of time they had to spend with their mistresses. Sen. James Williamson, R-Tulsa, rejected suggestions that the bill would reaffirm “Oklahoma values.” Williamson has been the official arbiter of Oklahoma values since his election in 1996.
Williamson said.
Not all male legislators oppose the bill, although those that support it are considered to be a bunch of pussies. However, some real men have backed the proposal. Sen. Frank Shurden, D-Henryetta, said he would consider voting for the legislation, providing nothing in the bill would require him to take his boots off.
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The Oklahoma PartisanIn 2004 & 2005, an anonymous group of journalist/artists compiled a library of what then was contemporary humor surrounding Oklahoma state government. Sadly the venture only lasted a couple years. But the Oklahoma Partisan was a gem of political comedy. Archives
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