From the archives of Oklahoma’s great political satire writers of decades past, we bring you this classic reprint of a spoof that caused more than a little irritation to the political class on Lincoln Blvd.
OKLAHOMA CITY (OP) – An Oklahoma City-based restaurant chain is asking the state legislature to legalize marijuana, noting that habitual users of the drug find the company’s products “hella-tasty.” Sonic, which bills itself as “America’s Drive-In,” serves up hamburgers and hotdogs in hundreds of locations around the country.
Executives say the company’s products are especially popular among those with “the munchies,” a side effect of marijuana intoxication. In a presentation before the House Business and Economic Development Committee, Sonic executives said statewide legalization of the drug would boost sales throughout the industry, from McNuggets to Taco Mayo’s “bitchin’” potato locos.
In a recent study, Sonic customers who did not use marijuana rated their food from “fair” to “excellent.” However, users with the munchies said the same products were “friggin’ awesome dude.” Habitual marijuana users, also known as “stoners,” are also less concerned with customer service. They also have little use for napkins, straws and correct change.
According to Sonic estimates, stoners currently comprise only 10 percent of the company’s customers, yet account for 40 percent of sales. They also form 70 percent of the company’s workforce, primarily line cooks and night managers. Last year, Sonic was believed to donate millions in campaign contributions. An exact amount was unavailable, however, since much of the special interest money was covered in chili and cheese.
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The Oklahoma PartisanIn 2004 & 2005, an anonymous group of journalist/artists compiled a library of what then was contemporary humor surrounding Oklahoma state government. Sadly the venture only lasted a couple years. But the Oklahoma Partisan was a gem of political comedy. Archives
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