Bryan in Tulsa

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

B in T Rants:

Skylar Thompson, ex K State Mildcat, and Brock ‘too’ Purdy, from Cyclone land both representing the Big 12 in the NFL playoffs!!  What happened to number 1 picks, Murray and Mayfield from Oklahoma!!  Oh, but there is 2022 MVP Jalen Hurts from Philadelphia via ‘Bama and OU!

New Coach Prime is going crazy with 274 offers for his new gig with Colorado!!  So far 159 have committed!!  Prime was not a math major at Florida State!!  Hell of a recruiter bro!

Midcourt Max of ORU is lighting up the scoreboard and is ranked 5th in the nation in scoring!!  Projected second round to the LA Lakers!  Or he could come back for one more year, and break many ORU and national records!!

TULSA REPRESENTS!

Dax Hill Cincinnati 918- BTW Hornets

Justice Hill Baltimore 918 - BTW Hornets

Clay Martin head ref 918 - Nathan Hale Rangers

Cardinal Baseball fans remember when Rick Ankiel could not hit his catcher's mitt in the 2000 playoffs against the Atlanta Braves!!  Ankiel not hitting strike zone in 2000 and Dallas Cowboy Kicker Maher missing 4 extra points in a row are why the NFL has sport psychiatrists that make 500 dollars an hour!  This is currently known as the ‘yips’ so...........I just save you a big psychiatrist bill!!

Pantera is headlining ROCKLAHOMA!  September 1-3  2023!

Two Stl. Cardinal 20-year-olds are possible future superstars!!  Jordan Walker a 6’5” 225 lbs third baseman/outfielder and Masynn Winn a 5’11” SS who threw out a runner with a 103 MPH throw to first base in a futures game!!  Only the second throw over 100MPH ever recorded from the SS position!!  Winn looks like a 2024 stud but Jordan may be sneaking into the lineup in 2023!!  They remind me of past Redbirds stars centerfielder Bake McBride and shortstop Gary Templeton!

Nude Pickleball is to a court near you if you don't watch out!  Naturist resorts all over the country are discovering that nudists want more pickle ball!!  Clothing-optional resorts are finding that pickleball facilities and hosting tournaments are in high demand among their guests and nude naturalist!!  I am putting a proposal together for our director at the Center, for Nude Pickleball!!

OU lady Sooner Robertson to break all-time 3-pointers made at 494 and will eclipse well over 500 before the season ends!!

Bobbleheads:

Verrrry Young Soccer Recruit!

To Papa B in T, it was devastating to watch his Grandson Gus on a front-row recruiting visit to TU’s hated basketball rivalry ‘the Golden Eagles of ORU!!!!’  I cried, but I did get my 3XL ORU Sweet 16 t-shirts!!  I did notice that ORU’s Name Licensing Image (NIL) dollars now include popcorn for basketball and soccer recruits!!

IMG_4918.heic

 NFL Playoffs:

NFC Championship

Eagles 31 49ers 27

The Eagles, led by former Sooner QB Jalen Hurts, scored 3 touchdowns two by sea and one by land!!  Two by pass and one by run, for non-nautical folks who follow B in T!!  49ers wittle bitty cuty QB Purdy was tucked away to nighty night till next season!!  His 705k contract will now include new play station games Madden, and NCAA 2024 for life!!  I shat u not!!

AFC Championship:

Chiefs 44 Bengals 41 OT

The Chiefs QB Mahomes battles Bengals star QB       

in a shoot-out similar to the movie Tombstone where each QB and gunfighter completed 95% of their throws and gunshots!  OT was settled by back-to-back then turn and fire at ten paces!!

B in T College Basketball Picks:

Tulsa 71 Memphis 69 OT

Last week's Andolis Pizza crowd was AMAZING!!  And TU wins in OT!!  This week's crowd eats the world's largest Cinnebun!!  TU wins in OT!!

Big 12 - SEC Challenge 

Oklahoma 71 Alabama 70

The the mini Sooner Schooner with midget ponies made its debut at the Loyd Noble arena!

The Rufneks are using OU National Champions gymnasts to steer the Mini wagon and tiny ponies!  Sooner’s Jacob Groves hits a three-pointer at the buzzer to win the SEC Challenge!  Loyd Noble fans be aware of horse poop while exciting! 

Mizzou 78 Iowa State 75

Mizzou wins by three at home and wins by three at home!  They mirror each other verrry closely!!

Baylor 84 Arkansas 67

The Razorbacks are having problems internally as which players are going pro and which are getting the Tyson Foods NIL deal for a lifetime deal on chicken nuggets!!

Tennessee 73 Texas 68

This will be a SEC football game score in 2 years!!

Kansas 81 at Kentucky 74

Too much of the Dick dude from Kansas!  No, geesh, I was not referring to Coach Self!

Oklahoma State 73 Ole Miss 61

State got lucky by playing the lowest NET ranking team in the SEC!!  OSU's defensive efficiency is 5th in the nation!!

Oral Roberts 89 Omaha 70

ORU is not part of the SEC challenge........but maybe they should be!!!  Could win 30 games this year!!

Have a great sports week!

Bryan in Tulsa

Bryan in Tulsa

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

Prayers for Marty Jacobs who is Josh Jacobs of the Las Vegas Raiders?  He is recovering from a recent heart attack!!  Marty and his brother were and still are Lift drivers for handicapped folks like me!!  

Both are sports nuts!??  Evidently Marty’s grandson called 911!!

 B in T Rant bout’ Nuthin!

Where Will Kliff ‘Waldo’ Kingsbury be next year!??

1 Alabama - terminated coaches go here to be analyst

2 Oklahoma State - offensive coordinator

3 Iowa - Kingsbury will bring the ‘run and shoot’ instead of the off tackle twice, and quick kick offense that has been Iowa tradition for decades!

Waldo Kingsbury

Will the egos of UT attempt to hire John Calipari from Kentucky OR will Kentucky fire Calipari and his 15 assistant coaches first??  Stay tuned for ‘As the Calipari Turns’ in 2023!

NBA Conspiracy Theory -  the Thunder are easily the youngest team in the NBA, and in their only TNT TV appearance this DECADE the refs made sure that Miami Heat superstar Jimmy Butler looked great with 25 free throws and 42 free shots for his team, at home!!  The Thunder must beat the refs and the NBA this year!!  Keep shooting Thunder, your time will come!!  Oh, the Thunder lost to the Heat with a FREE THROW with 1 second left!!  WTFrick!!  Geeeesh!  Conspiracy Theory with Thunder and NBA will be on CBS 60 Minutes in two weeks!!

Rondell Bothroyd Oklahoma football transfer from Wake Forrest is on my all-name team 2023!!  Both-royd sounds like the dog’s name on the old Jetsons cartoons!!

Astro

Brazil folks please learn from the U.S. Capital building attempted takeover and hide your faces when attempting a felony on world TV!!!

I think Mrs. B in T has a crush on Gov. Stitt!  WTF!!  I voted for him!!

What does the statement “you're killing me smalls” mean?  Is your name mister Smalls and someone is attempting to kill u!!  This is confusing and I refuse to GOOGLE it!!

Kedarian Ray pulled his tail out of the transfer portal!!  HUGE ‘get’ for the new staff at TU!!

I honestly felt I was done with the fundraising to friends and relatives!!  Wrong Blue and Gold Sausage breath!!  The Center will be taking us to a few Boccia Tournaments this year and I will be begging my 11 readers to buy some popcorn!!

Broth Bar??!!??!!

This is not right dude!!  There is a broth bar 3 blocks from MY HOUSE, WTFrick is happening, next, there will be a strip club in my front yard.............hey wait, nawwww!  Broth Bars are places to hang when there is no other place in the entire universe left to hang!

B in T College Basketball Picks:

ORU 79 at ND State 59

                        and

ORU 87 at North Dakota 66

The North Dakota State and North Dakota three-day tour is close to the animated movie Frozen II as the ORU staff and players wanted to get!!  The bus from Fargo to Grand Forks, North Dakota snow plowed into a 50ft snow drift, forcing the ORU team to use Nike Mukluks and walk the remaining 12 miles of stranded cars and massive snow drifts!!  The Golden Eagles win both games by a combined 41 points!!  Even after a 12-mile walk in a blizzard!!

Arkansas 88 Ole Miss 66

The Razorback team was led by Council the 4th who scored 28 points for the streaking Men in red!!  The Rebels are still reveling over a bad football season end!

Iowa State 74 at Ok State 69

The Clones are looking for a way to win at Gallagher Iba, so they were awarded 35 free throws and made 32!!  The three Big 12 refs were from the east but all three played Bball at Dez Moines High School, hmmmmmm verrrrrry interesting!

Oklahoma 70 Baylor 67

Sooner coach Moser has asked both of the Grove brothers to wear white headbands for the remainder of the season!!  This will remove the bad vibes from Loyd Noble and allow the Sooners to reach the Final Four!!

Tulsa 68 Tulane 63

The TU Student Section was packed with students for Pajama Night in their PJs except for the Lambda Chi’s who studied and wore their Harry Potter costumes!

Bobbleheads:  

Conspiracy Theory:

After hanging with the grandkids for a couple of hundred hours the last couple of weeks I have concluded that some of the kid shows are created by aliens, cults, or foreign countries!!  that are attempting to take over our minds and rule the world!!  No shat!! And if you play shows like Daniel Tiger, Marsha Bear, or Paw Patrol, backward you will hear the Devil telling you to watch porn!!  Try it, I dare ya!!

ie:  Helter Skelter, Beatles

NFL Playoff picks:

Cowboys 38 FartyNiners 31

Yes, I am back on the Cowboy bandwagon after one week of brain spasms!!

Iowa State fans claim they knew Brock Purdy would be great as Mr Totally Irrelevant - the last player drafted in the 2022 NFL draft!  San Fran fans claim that he is great because of coach Kyle Shanahan molded him to the future next great Tommy Brady!!  The bragging battles between So Cal snobs and Cyclone Nation over the actual ownership of Mr Purdy loyalty continues!!

Have a great sports week!

Bryan in Tulsa

Praying ?? Damar Hamlin

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

B in T Rants bout nutin’

*The Gateway Arch and Busch Stadium were both under construction in 1965!!

If you look veeeerrry closely, you may see a young B in T on summer break from TU operating the giant crane!!

*2022 B in T Grade cards for area college teams:

Oklahoma  6-7 -  C+   Lots of hot air from the early prognosticators and Sooner radio KREF, then switched to 5th rated 2023 recruiting class to put honey on the open wound of a 6 and 7 season!!

Oklahoma State 7-6- C-   A few weeks ago the Cowboys were dreaming of a final 4 season and a top 10 ranking!!  

The Cowboy faithful are praying for the Gundy Mullet to come back or for the man under the mullet to not come back!  The football Grinch took this away and is making next year's team look very average!  With Spencer Sanders's bye-bye in portal land and the backup QB’s arm strength compared to a 6th grader at Owasso, next year looks like another C-ish grade!!

Arkansas 7-6  C   The Hog fans are still enamored by coach Pittman, but another 7-6 season and the restless Tyson and Walton money will look to offer some big bucks to Urban Meyers!!

Tulsa 5-7  C~  Coach Montgomery has moved on to be the OC at Auburn, and we have ex-Sooner and current Ohio State OC Kevin Wilson to steer the Hurricane in 2023!! 

Last year ended with a hard-fought victory over the Houston Cougars, giving them a farewell boot to the Big 12!!  Overall a disappointing year and sad to see a good man lose his job but business is business and college football is corporate $$$$$$$$!!

*Tulsa basketball and football may need a year or two!!  I am proud Tulsa basketball held Houston to under a hundred and we have a commitment from the number 1 player in Colorado for 2024!!  I am afraid that TU softball and OU baseball are where my energy spikes in spring 2023!!

*The OKC Thunder started 3 20-year-olds, a 22 and a 24-year-old last week!!  The future is bright!!  But the present can be trying!!

*TCU QB is special, no NIL deal, no hot girlfriend or mom are seen 500 times by the ESPN cameraman, and no dad who thinks he knows everything!!  

*Tulsa QB Braylin Braxton will be in New York for the 2023 Heisman Award presentation!  I am just sayin’ bro, like with TCU this year, miracles can happen!!

*Oklahoma wins the Big 12 in 2023!  AND half of the vaunted 2023 fifth-ranked recruiting class entered the transfer portal!!  WTF!

*New Years Eve’s Miley Cyrus and Dolly Pardon Special was average!  The Talking Heads dude song ‘young as I never was’ and Miley’s ‘Party in the USA’ were the only songs I recognized!!  Ms. Cyrus' legs are not good for an old fart stroke survivor, but I did peek at ‘the legs’ and survived till midnight!!

B in T Picks:

College Football National Championship, SoFi Stadium in Inglewood, California.

1-9-23

TCU 43 Georgia 42

I picked Texas Christian because their mascot is a horny toad as my grandma Audoo used to say and smile!  

Also, their QB Duggan is a cross between carrot top ? and Richie Cunninghan!  TCU kicks a 51-yard field goal as time runs out!!  Texas Christian Fans rush the field in SoFi Stadium in Inglewood, California, and squish the poor hormy frog mascot!!

College Basketball Picks:

Texas 82 at a Oklahoma State 79

The Texas coach Beard is pretty puckered up regarding some fight with a relative.  My sources say the board will meet in May of 2032 to decide his future!  Really!  Longhorn a hit a half-court shot to win at the buzzer!!

Kentucky 74 at Alabama 69

Both teams could play in the Big 12, really they are that frickin good!!

Kansas 81 at West Virginia 75

A couple of Mountaineer fans were expelled from the their seats behind the Kansas bench for mooning coach Self’s wife!  

Texas Tech 84 Oklahoma 74

The Sooners are making an early case for the NIT!  Coach Moser needs to light a fire under the Groves brothers!  The new OU scoring machine, Sherfield, needs to learn to share the ball!!

ORU 92 Kansas City 81

ORU has more talented players than Max Abmas, well...........I may have to recant that!  Abbas stat line:  33 points, 13 assists, 4 steals, 7 rebs!

Arkansas 77 at Auburn 75

The Tiger’s alum and TNT funny man Charles Barkley, got into the smallish Razorback coach’s face for getting on the court too much with his size 5 men's Nikes!!  The Razorback's talent overcame the tremendous crowd at the Auburn Arena!!

Tulane 78 Tulsa 71

Small Tulane crowd of 938 to watch two TUs battle for the AD Rick Dickson Trophy who has been a super Athletic Director for both of the mid-majors!!  Tulsa's over-under of 10 wins is being played for the under in Vegas!  Ouch, back to TU softball!!

BOBBLEHEAD SPORTS

When Babysitting Rug Rats You Will Do ANYTHING To Keep the Rats Happy!!

Have a great sports week!!

Bryan in Tulsa