MOBILE, AL—A California man who was visiting some friends in Alabama shocked the group when committed blatant cultural appropriation, saying the word "y'all" even though he was born and raised in Los Angeles.

The post Non-Southerner Who Says 'Y'all' Accused Of Cultural Appropriation appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

BOSTON, MA—According to sources, local Christian Bartholomew Vanderbilt experienced a strange sense of déjà vu while walking past No Walls City Church in Boston. Upon seeing the church doors, the cross, and the stained glass windows, he had a very vague recollection of something he used to do on Sunday mornings.

The post Christian Has Vague Recollection Of Something He Used To Do On Sunday Mornings appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

CLEVELAND, OH—In a brilliant debate performance, candidate Joe Biden offered his most compelling case for election yet, saying: "If I am elected, you'll get to see what all my policy positions are!" 

The post Biden: 'You Have To Elect Me To Find Out What My Policy Positions Are' appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

U.S.—Millions of Americans tuned in Tuesday night to finally see President Trump and Joe Biden debate on stage. And the reaction was pure excitement.

The post Americans Come Out Of Debate Excited By Their Two Great Choices appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

U.S.—For the common good of Americans, the next presidential debate will be held aboard a rocket. That rocket will then take off. Then, it will smash into the sun after the two passengers debate for the few months it takes to get there.

The post Next Presidential Debate To Be Held On Rocket That Is Then Launched Into The Sun appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

U.S.—Many were looking forward to the presidential debate tonight, hoping to thoughtfully consider each candidate's position so they could make a wise, informed decision about who to vote for in this year's election.

The post Broadcast Signal Accidentally Picks Up Two Old Men Yelling At Each Other Instead Of Presidential Debate appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

CLEVELAND, OH—Biden came out swinging in tonight's presidential debate. For the first several minutes, he shocked the live audience and viewers across the country with his clear, concise rhetoric and thoughtful, well-researched answers. Unfortunately, suspicions arose when what appeared to be a radio antenna slowly emerged from the back of Biden's head.

The post Foul Play Suspected As Radio Antenna Slowly Emerges From Biden's Head appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

CLEVELAND, OH—In a diabolical power-move that threw off Biden's debate game and shocked the audience, Trump went into his debate with Biden wearing a woman's wig. 

The post Trump Throws Biden Off His Game By Wearing Luscious Women's Wig To Debate appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

CLEVELAND, OH—After weeks of buildup, the Biden campaign ended the first presidential debate after just a few moments when his aides called a lid halfway through the first question. 

The post Biden Campaign Calls A Lid Halfway Through First Question appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

ROCHESTER, MN—According to sources, local wife and mother Lindsay Bennett left the house with her daughter last Saturday around noon to make a Target run, leaving her husband home to watch the rest of the kids.

The post Wife Heads To Target To Get Some Things For Next Year's Rummage Sale appeared first on The Babylon Bee.