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Peter And Andrew Disappointed To Learn They Will Not Actually Be Catching Men With Giant Novelty Fish Hooks

7/31/2022

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GALILEE — Local fishermen Peter and Andrew were deeply disappointed to discover today that Jesus was not, in fact, going to teach them to catch humans with giant novelty fish hooks.


Peter And Andrew Disappointed To Learn They Will Not Actually Be Catching Men With Giant Novelty Fish Hooks,
July 31, 2022 at 02:56PM from Babylon Bee, at Babylon Bee

Click on the headline to read the full article at Babylon Bee
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Strong Independent Woman Needs Man To Leave Toilet Seat Down Or She Will Literally Fall In

7/31/2022

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HENDERSON, NV — Tough, independent woman Maggie Stallings once again told her husband today that he absolutely must leave the toilet seat down or she will actually fall into the commode.


Strong, Independent Woman Needs Man To Leave Toilet Seat Down Or She Will Literally Fall In,
July 31, 2022 at 09:12AM from Babylon Bee, at Babylon Bee

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Joel Osteen Berates Apostle Paul For Negative Self-Talk About Being 'Chief Of Sinners'

7/31/2022

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HOUSTON, TX — Joel Osteen took the Apostle Paul to task on Sunday, calling out his awful habit of negative self-talk and overly mournful diatribes.


Joel Osteen Berates Apostle Paul For Negative Self-Talk About Being 'Chief Of Sinners',
July 31, 2022 at 09:10AM from Babylon Bee, at Babylon Bee

Click on the headline to read the full article at Babylon Bee
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Pileup At All-Female Tour De France After Woman In Front Stops To Ask For Directions

7/30/2022

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FRANCE — A spectacular crash at the Tour de France Femmes, the first-ever all-female Tour de France event following the main race, was reportedly caused by the woman in front stopping to ask for directions.


Pileup At All-Female Tour De France After Woman In Front Stops To Ask For Directions,
July 30, 2022 at 02:08PM from Babylon Bee, at Babylon Bee

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11 Woke Changes Coming to Grand Theft Auto

7/30/2022

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Just when you thought the woke monster couldn't add another victim, it took down one of its most surprising targets yet: the Grand Theft Auto franchise. How, exactly, does a game that already mines the depths of human depravity turn itself woke? Here are 11 woke changes coming with the release of Grand Theft Auto 6:


11 Woke Changes Coming to Grand Theft Auto,
July 30, 2022 at 10:28AM from Babylon Bee, at Babylon Bee

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Boomer Begins Voicemail By Listing Off All The Information Your Phone Already Provided

7/30/2022

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HUNTINGTON, NY — Local woman Christine Upton listened patiently this morning to a voicemail from her boomer father, who spent the first thirty seconds carefully listing information her phone had already provided.


Boomer Begins Voicemail By Listing Off All The Information Your Phone Already Provided,
July 30, 2022 at 07:30AM from Babylon Bee, at Babylon Bee

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Democrats To Try Bold Strategy Of Doing Exactly What Got Us Into This Mess In The First Place

7/30/2022

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WASHINGTON, D.C. — After a year of deliberation on how to address rapid inflation and a shrinking economy, Democrats have at last landed on the bold strategy of doing the same exact things that helped land us in this mess to begin with.


Democrats To Try Bold Strategy Of Doing Exactly What Got Us Into This Mess In The First Place,
July 30, 2022 at 07:28AM from Babylon Bee, at Babylon Bee

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Persecution Report: This Woman Put Her Bible Verse-A-Day Calendar On Her Desk At Work And No One Has Asked Her About It

7/29/2022

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KNOXVILLE, TN — Local woman Carol Hughes is being blatantly persecuted for her faith while at work. After she placed a flowery, verse-a-day calendar on her office desk earlier today, not a single person has commented on it in any way, shape, or form.


Persecution Report: This Woman Put Her Bible Verse-A-Day Calendar On Her Desk At Work And No One Has Asked Her About It,
July 29, 2022 at 04:49PM from Babylon Bee, at Babylon Bee

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White House Hires 'This Is Fine' Dog As New Press Secretary

7/29/2022

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WASHINGTON, D.C. — Citing the candidate's qualifications at assuring everyone that everything is fine even when entire rooms are burning down around him, the White House has hired the This Is Fine Dog as its new press secretary.


White House Hires 'This Is Fine' Dog As New Press Secretary,
July 29, 2022 at 04:36PM from Babylon Bee, at Babylon Bee

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CDC Declares Gay Orgies An 'Essential Activity'

7/29/2022

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ATLANTA, GA — The CDC has updated its list of essential and non-essential activities during a pandemic or outbreak, adding "gay orgies" to the "essential" category.


CDC Declares Gay Orgies An 'Essential Activity',
July 29, 2022 at 04:15PM from Babylon Bee, at Babylon Bee

Click on the headline to read the full article at Babylon Bee
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    Steeple Chasers is a collective..

      A place to laugh, when you love Jesus, but find his fiancee' to be rather difficult.
    ​ (bless her heart)
      Faith with humility and self-awareness is a good mix of virtues. And a merry heart makes some good medicine, too. So let's laugh with others.

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