NEW YORK, NY — Family, friends, and legal advisors of President Donald Trump were confused after learning Trump used his one phone call to contact Florida Governor Ron DeSantis and berate him from his location in a New York jail.

NEW YORK, NY — Family, friends, and legal advisors of President Donald Trump were confused after learning Trump used his one phone call to contact Florida Governor Ron DeSantis and berate him from his location in a New York jail.

PRINCETON, NJ — Scientists have concluded a years-long study confirming the indisputable correlation between people putting trust in their government and people also eating paint chips.

U.S. — Members of the media are calling for caution in their reporting after a German-identified man named Adolf Hitler (he/him) suddenly called the Jewish people a "race-tuberculosis of the peoples" and implemented a final solution to wipe them off the face of the earth. Experts warn that focusing on the systematic murder of six million Jews by this Hitler fellow could cause a violent backlash against Nazis.

PRINCETON, NJ — Scientists have concluded a years-long study confirming the indisputable correlation between people putting trust in their government and people also eating paint chips.

U.S. — Members of the media are calling for caution in their reporting after a German-identified man named Adolf Hitler (he/him) suddenly called the Jewish people a "race-tuberculosis of the peoples" and implemented a final solution to wipe them off the face of the earth. Experts warn that focusing on the systematic murder of six million Jews by this Hitler fellow could cause a violent backlash against Nazis.

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democrat Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi is calling for a quick conviction of Trump so that we can all see what he's being charged with.

LONDON — A successful marketing firm in the U.K. has come up with an ingenious plan, deciding that the centuries-old landmark Piccadilly Circus is an ideal place for an enormous Burger King billboard.