U.S..—A new Reuters poll released Friday indicated that 100% of people who are James Comey believe that James Comey did nothing wrong as the director of the FBI.

The post Poll Finds 100% Of People Who Are James Comey Believe James Comey Did Nothing Wrong appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

The post Lady Who Just Cut You Off Forgiven After She Gives Little Wave Of Apology appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

FLORIDA—As yet another hurricane approached the Florida coast this evening, and people still apparently live in Florida for some reason, brave leftist warriors were deployed into the middle of the storm in order to signal the hurricane to go kill their political opponents.

The post Leftists Stand In Midst Of Storm Signaling Hurricane To Go Kill Their Political Opponents appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

HANOVER, NH—At a New Hampshire campaign stop, presidential candidate Joe Biden claimed he was at Mount Doom 3,000 years ago when Isildur decided to take the Ring instead of destroying it.

The post Biden Claims He Was There 3,000 Years Ago When Isildur Took The Ring And The Strength Of Men Failed appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

Listen to this episode on our podcast page or most podcast platforms.

The post Podcast #12: Church Camp Horror Stories appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

U.S.—Now that the ten candidates have been finalized for the next Democratic presidential debate, the ground rules for the debate are being decided. One early rule is to ban all use of facts and logic from the debate, as they’ve increasingly been a tool of far-right extremists and have fallen out of favor with the Democrats' progressive base.

The post Facts, Logic Banned From Next Democratic Debate For Being Tools Of The Alt-Right appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

U.S.—Millions of Americans have repented of their sinful ways and turned to Jesus after hearing that Democrats are going to be on CNN for seven whole hours talking about climate change next week.

The post Nation Begs Jesus To Return Before Democrats' 7-Hour Town Hall On Climate Change appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

SAN DIEGO, CA—A popular new craft IPA created by Stonemission Point Brewery is actually just a bottle of Pine-Sol, sources at the brewery admitted Thursday.

The post Popular New Craft IPA Just Bottle Of Pine-Sol appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

U.S.—After some confusion was expressed by casual observers of apparent hypocrisy in their denunciation of Dave Chappelle's most recent comedy special, liberals from around the country clarified that they only want black voices to be heard when those voices are saying liberal-approved things.

The post Liberals Clarify They Only Want Black Voices To Be Heard When They're Saying Liberal Things appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

NEW YORK, NY—After Lawrence O'Donnell admitted to publishing a sensational, world-altering, but also totally fake story about Trump's finances and Russia, MSNBC confessed that it simply makes up all its reports about Trump using the patented Mad Libs system of making up random words and sticking them in blanks in pre-written sentences.

The post MSNBC Admits They Make Up All Stories About Trump Using Book Of Mad Libs appeared first on The Babylon Bee.